Now, let's dive in... You and I know that we can sometimes get into a place where we build a wall of distrust for our own safety but then find ourselves isolated behind it because no one is allowed back there with us anymore. Sometimes, our histories of ignoring red flags can boost us to only see red everywhere we look because we've grown afraid of ever being hurt again. It's understandable!
"Distrust is sometimes the most responsible and appropriate choice to make." ~ Lysa
Learning to trust isn't an easy process, but it is a necessary one. We need people and most of all we need a vibrant relationship with God. We might need to acknowledge that even God Himself may have been shut out of the safe perimeter.
So, we need this, right? Not only do we want to address our valid and understandable trust issues, but we want to be trustworthy people for others to lean on. We want to learn how to care for others by incorporating what we've learned from being hurt in the past.
Part of the beauty of the nature of relationships is that we've all experienced broken trust. We can empathize with others who are wary and gun-shy because we're all in the same boat.
"I don't want to be naïve, but I also don't want to be avoidant." ~ Lysa
This week we're learning about the requirements of trust. Even if Lysa's statement
"To have trust, there must be two crucial factors: first – safety, and the other – connection." ~ Lysa
might seem like a pretty basic truth, given our histories, it's one we need to digest.
Safety + Connection -> Trust
"Part of how trust is built in relationships is when the connection is safe for both people." ~ Lysa
My heart starts races at this because I've gone through a period when my safety (physical, emotional, and spiritual) was very compromised. There was not only not peace in that long season, but chaos ruled. Maybe that's been true for you in the past, too.
Lysa shares these vital questions we have to ask: Am I safe with this person physically? emotionally? spiritually?
Given my increased blood pressure, I know that fear can hold us back from the thing we need so desperately – community with others and relationship with God. We can trust God. Always. And, while people don't hold a candle to His trustworthiness, we can still learn to trust those who prove themselves in the areas of safety and connection.
Biblical love = Seeking each other's highest good
"Unselfish love is the safest kind of connect that makes trust so much less risky in human relationships." ~ Lysa
Friends, let's remember that trust isn't a given in relationships except in our relationship with God. In fact, it's just plain dangerous and foolish to just blindly trust someone. Trust is a gift we give to someone who has proven themselves to be trustworthy over time.
~ Lysa
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